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Making A Relationship Last

I'm sure you've wondered why there are some women who have longer, happier relationships with the men in their lives than others? You've probably attributed it to the men (they had all the great qualities), or the attraction between them (it was true love), or they were simply compatible (they were "meant" for each other).

The truth is, there are no rules in the dating game. Everything happens spontaneously. You can't say you're in love, but you just feel it in the gut. I'm sure you've felt this before with a man in your life, and that's the easy part - most women know how to get into a relationship. The tricky part is in keeping the relationship growing.

Many women tend to take along some hurts from previous relationships. And when they see these hurts about to resurface in their present relationship, they do everything in their power to fix it and keep it from "getting in the way" again.

The problem is that men do not take all this fuss very well. They see you as making such a big deal out of a little problem, and no amount of convincing, explaining, and arguing can make them see things the way you do. Needless to say, this disagreement can escalate until the relationship falls apart.

Here's how to keep your emotions from getting in the way of a good relationship:

1) Establish a deeper emotional connection with your man. It's easy to fall in love with a guy with just his looks, but it takes a deeper emotional connection to make a relationship last. Focus on his good attributes and learn to appreciate them, diverting your attention from any gnawing issues you might find.

2) Understand your man better - go the extra mile and try to be in touch with his interests and beliefs. This makes your relationship more interesting, and it opens the doors to a more giving (and forgiving) setup with him. He'll appreciate the fond attention, and will be more likely to reciprocate your efforts.

3) Don't give in to him too easily. When a guy tells you that he'd like to get involved in a deeper relationship right after the first date, don't fall into the trap. Firstly, rushing into a relationship will make him lose interest in you in a heartbeat, and the relationship will end just as quickly. Set your terms and tell him what you're expecting in a relationship. Whether he gets motivated or shies away, you rid yourself of a great deal of emotional trauma.

4) Keep communicating with him. The more the two of you talk about yourselves, the better your chances of establishing a deeper connection with him in all aspects of the relationship.

Don't waste your time looking for Mr Perfect. Relationships don't simply fall into place - it takes a lot of work on the part of both you and your man. So next time you feel that deep attraction for your man, make sure you do your part - if you do, chances are he'll do the same, and the relationship will only get better from there.

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